Ocho de Mayo!

Why do millions of Americans struggle with reading and writing?
Cause they're fuggin idjits!

Plans for the pope's visit hit a wall in Bethlehem
Hope the Popemobile has airbags.

Sri Lankan 'detention' camps swell with Tamils
but are they neat?

Dom DiMaggio Dies; Played in His Brother’s Shadow
It was always 5 degrees cooler there.

Patient Money: For Gay Couples, Obstacles to Health Insurance
Maybe if they stopped putting thing in their poopers.

Top flu expert warns of a swine flu-bird flu mix
and so begins the pigs-fly jokes...
http://nicfitz.blogspot.com/2009/04/pig-flu.html

Cuba teams with Qatar to build beach resort
You can checkout any time you like, but you can never leave.

Rapist may be suspect in six cases
If they chop him up a bit more, he could be in 8 cases.

Double hand transplant patient recovering well
until he decided give the doctors a round of applause.

Just call her 'Dr. Dolly': Parton receives Ph.D
actually, it's a Ph. Double D.