Why did Helen Keller's dog bite her?

Sept. 11 planner waterboarded 183 times: report
Only 2,793 times to go and he'll still be alive!

IAEA urges sticking to talks with North Korea, Iran
IAEA sounds like something Helen Keller would name her dog.

Obama says reaching out to enemies strengthens US
"But it worked out so well for Neville Chamberlain."

Congress set to tackle credit cards, health care
"But it worked out so well for poverty & drug use."

Congress considers major global warming measure
"But it worked out so well for education & the economy."

Today's Highlight in History:

Ten years ago, on April 20, 1999, the Columbine High School massacre took place in Colorado as two students, Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold, shot and killed 12 classmates and one teacher before taking their own lives. Good thing we have Gun-Free Zones so stuff like that can't happen again!

In 1812, the fourth vice president of the United States, George Clinton, died in Washington at age 72, becoming the first vice president to die while in office. Apparently, the Parliment was still too funkadelic.

In 1971, the U.S. Supreme Court, in Swann v. Charlotte-Mecklenburg Board of Education, unanimously upheld the use of busing to achieve racial desegregation in schools. I expect governmental involvment with global warming to be just as successful.